Yesterday I made the decision to let go of someone in my life. I did not make this decision lightly. It's taken me quite a while to muster up the courage. I dearly love this person but the situation has not been a healthy one for me. I've allowed whatever our relationship has been to affect my self-worth. It has affected other areas of my life as well. I've realized this for quite a while. My friends and family have told me to move on and logically it has made sense. Hell, I would have given them the same advice but I needed to make the decision on my own time. I've known that this person can't give me what I desire and even that which was given had been taken away recently. I'm reminded that my Higher Good has had no place to show up in my life because my focus has been on this person. I have felt stuck and have known that only I can make the change. It's been one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I feel so deeply connected to this person but it's been too big of a price to for me to pay. I am hopeful that I can save the friendship once I've given myself time to heal.
I think we all have had some sort of situation, be it a person or a job, etc wherein we knew it wasn't good for us but we stayed. We stayed because there was a certain familiarity, a consistency if you will. We may have imagined leaving the situation but then we got scared. It's like the metaphor of the groundhog seeing it's shadow. Will it be frightened by it and crawl back into the comfort of the dark or step out fearlessly into the light, bright unknown? By the way, my birthday is on Groundhog's Day....go figure!
To be completely honest, I'm sitting with thoughts of regret and wondering if I was too rash. This is the time I call my support system of family and friends. These are the people that can truly see and hold the Highest Good for me. They remind me what a brave thing I've done and how much strength of character and courage it takes. I know that I'm demonstrating to the Universe that I will no longer accept less. I feel a bit like I'm finally "getting with the program". The challenge for me now is not to dwell on remorse. I know I will miss this person in my life but that's okay. It just reminds me how much I allow myself to feel and I think that's a good thing. I'm ready to be "unstuck"!
Here is a poem by Rumi that puts a smile on my face when I'm feeling sorrow. It reminds me of the power of Joy:
I saw Sorrow
holding a cup of pain.
I said, hey sorrow,
sorry to see you this way.
What's troubling you?
What's with the cup?
Sorrow said,
what else can I do?
All this Joy that you have brought to the world has killed my business completely.
Here is a video of the uber-talented Margaret Owens wherein she sings a song about letting go after a short skit and a song at the 5:21 minute mark under the "Epilogue". The epilogue song has a wonderful line in it that jolts me wide awake. The line is "the moment you serve your own heart is the moment you are free". Thank you Margaret!
So, I invite you to look at anything, large or small, that might be holding you back from your Greater Good yet to be. It's kind of like taking inventory except that there's no "right" count one has to arrive at. If you find something or have known that there's something then I support you 110% in your process of letting go. It doesn't matter that I may have never met you. I can hold the intention of the highest and best for anyone. I know how I feel right now and my empathy runs deep!
Blessing myself and all around me,
Stephen
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